


Holding Hands Against the Wind and Rain

by Caedmon



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, adjusting to Pete's World
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-20
Updated: 2016-01-20
Packaged: 2018-05-15 05:25:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5772976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caedmon/pseuds/Caedmon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It'll take time and patience, but Rose and the Doctor think they may be able to weather this storm.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Holding Hands Against the Wind and Rain

**Author's Note:**

> for timelordinvictus who asked for Tentoo and Rose adjusting to life on Pete's World. This was supposed to be a drabble. Fail.
> 
> Hope you like it, hon!
> 
> I own nothing.  
> All mistakes are mine.  
> Kudos and comments feed the muse, thank you!  
> caedmonfaith.tumblr.com

The Doctor found himself outside the door to Rose’s room in Pete Tyler’s mansion, staring at the patterns of the wood grain instead of knocking.

 _White oak_ , he thought bleakly. 

They had only been back from Darlig Ulv Stranden for a couple of hours, and the ride back to London had been...odd. Rose’s hand rested in his the whole way, but she stared out of the window at the passing countryside rather than talk to him. He’d done much the same; contemplating his loss, trying desperately not to think about what The Other Doctor was doing to Donna. His best friend.

 _No,_ he’d corrected himself, squeezing Rose’s hand a little, _Rose is your best friend; no matter how much you love Donna, she’s not Rose. They’re different._

Rose had turned to look at him at the squeeze, offering him a little tight-lipped smile then turning back to the scenery. He’d heard her sniffle every now and then, and he’d squeeze her hand in comfort when he did. She would respond with a tiny little contraction of her hand in his, but didn’t look at him or engage him in conversation. 

She’d dropped his hand completely when they pulled up at Pete’s mansion and hadn’t taken it again. She’d simply shown him to his room and said she’d be just down the hall.

The Doctor had debated with himself about whether he should go to her or leave her be to process everything that had happened. _She needs time_ , he told himself. _The Other Doctor stranded her here with me. She’s bound to be...she needs time._

“Sod that,” he answered himself out loud now, still staring at the door. When had he ever let Rose Tyler be upset without offering himself up to her? When had he ever let her cry without giving himself to her as comfort? Even when she was upset with him, he’d never left her without at least checking on her. 

He raised his hand to knock but the door opened in front of him, leaving his loose fist suspended in the air in front of him and Rose standing in the doorway, looking at him with puffy red eyes, wearing her nightclothes. The sight of her in a camisole and flannel pajama pants, her pink-painted toes peeking out and hair in a messy ponytail was so achingly familiar that he nearly groaned out loud with longing. It had been so long...so long...all of that was gone now and she was the only way he was going to survive this.

She didn’t flinch away or try to cover herself, she just looked at him steadily with red, swollen eyes. 

“I wondered if I would see you tonight,” she said, her voice not quite flat but not entirely welcoming. The Doctor felt hope surge within him anyway.. 

“I missed you,” he blurted, then cursed himself for letting the thought escape unchecked from his brain. _That’ll be the Donna in you_ , he groused internally. _Have to watch that._

Rose nodded, but her eyes filled with tears. “I missed you, too.”

“Can we talk?”

She looked over him speculatively, then opened the door wider, inviting him in. The Doctor brushed past her, and Rose shut the door behind them.

“Reckon we need to talk,” she said.

“I meant what I said, Rose.” _Bloody hell. Am I going to be spouting everything that pops into my head now?_

Rose just nodded.

The Doctor went on, intentionally this time. “I love you.”

She looked at him with eyes that were impossibly full of tears. “I’m confused.”

He opened his arms and she stepped into them, putting her forehead to his chest and covering her mouth with both hands in an attempt to stifle her sobs. He draped his arms around her, pulling her just a little closer. “I know, love.”

“Who are you?” she asked against his chest.

“I’m the Doctor,” he said quietly. “I’m the man you know. The same man you’ve always known.”

“ _He_ said you were different.”

“I’m a bit different, but not in any of the ways that matter. I was born in battle, yes, but so was I when you met me, fresh from the Time War. Remember the big ears? What a daft, grumpy sod I was?” She nodded against his chest and he thought she may have laughed a little. He went on. “I’ve got a bit of Donna in me, so I’m like as not to be a bit more sassy.”

“God help us all,” she muttered and he smiled, encouraged.

“Oi, now,” he chided gently.

“But are you really... _you_?”

“I remember everything, Rose. Everything we did together, I remember every second. Every little moment. I’ll prove it to you, if you’d like. You can ask me anything. This is just like when I regenerated after the Gamestation, except I’m not going to be as different to you this time.”

Tears clotted the her throat, and she struggled to get the words out. “Do you still…you said…I used to think...do you…”

“I love you, Rose. I love you with my whole heart. I’ve only the one, but it belongs to you.”

She let out a little sob and he tightened his arms around her, burying his face in her hair. Rose slid her arms around his waist, under his jacket, the way she had done since he wore leather. 

“I had nightmares,” she admitted against his shoulder. “Every night that we were apart.”

“What about, love?” he stroked her back.

“I dreamed that you could get back to me but didn’t want to. I dreamed that I got back to you and you didn’t want me. I dreamed that you...that you didn’t care about all of the things I did to get back to you, you laughed at how hard I’d worked. I dreamed-”

He pulled back and tipped her chin up to look at him. “I tried _everything_ to get to you, Rose. _Everything._ I went so far as to weigh the pros and cons of collapsing the two universes, wondering to myself whether I could actually get all of us to another, safe universe while I tore this one and our first one apart. I was willing to do it. I would have happily torn reality apart to get back to you, Rose Tyler. In the end, I didn’t because I knew that you wouldn’t want me to do that. Not really. Not my precious girl.”

She shook her head, and he took that as a denial that she would have wanted him to collapse reality.

“Rose?” he said in a voice soft as down. She raised her eyes to look at him. “How could you ever think that I wouldn’t want you? _All_ I want is you, love.”

Two more fat tears fell to her cheeks and he wrapped her up in his arms again, snug and secure. The Doctor let her cry a little, sorry for her pain and confusion, simultaneously furious and endlessly grateful to The Other Doctor who left them here, stranded.

“Rose?” he asked again into her hair after a while, when she had quieted a bit.

“Hmm?”

“I know this isn’t what you wanted. I know you wanted to fly away in the Tardis with the other me. But...I’m him and I’m here.” He took a breath. “D’you remember on that beach, the first time? I told you that the slow path, the domestic, every day life was _‘the one adventure I could never have.’ Not_ ‘the one adventure I never wanted’ or _‘the adventure which repulsed me._ ’ Neither of those, Rose. I thought I _couldn’t_ have this, love. A life with you, a real life? That’s all I’ve wanted since...blimey. I don’t know when I stopped thinking of me and started thinking of ‘we’. 

“But I don’t know _how_ to do this, Rose, d’you understand? It’s not a lack of desire, it’s a lack of insight. I’m rubbish at domestics. The slow path doesn’t scare me one bit. Not with you. He hurt us both by leaving, but he also gave us a gift. Now, finally, I can give you all of the things I wanted to but couldn’t before. I can give you a home, the white picket fence, a car and a dog...anything you want. And in a few years, we can travel the stars again.”

“Sounds nice,” she murmured into his shoulder.

“And I know you’re confused and hurt and angry at me. You've been through so much, love, and things didn't end the way you expected. We find ourselves in the middle of a storm, yeah? But we've weathered much worse together, haven't we? God, Rose, if I could survive being away from you, and everything you did to get back to me... I know we can survive this. We're together in this storm, it's not just you. I want to be with you, so I…what I mean to say is, if you’d be willing...” he paused again, gathering his willpower. “I’d like to date you. Just like humans would.”

Rose lifted her head from her shoulder to look up at him. “You want to be my boyfriend?”

He fought back a wince. He was nine-hundred-and-three. Hardly a boy. But that was the correct lingo, so…

“Yes. If you’ll have me.”

She looked up at him, her eyes searching his and he knew she was looking for imperfections, differences, something to tell her exactly who he was. She was searching for truth in his eyes. He did the same; he’s been starved for the sight of her, and now he was gorging himself on her liquid brown eyes. 

_God, he loved her._

“We’re stuck here,” she said finally.

“For a while, yes.”

“Do you remember what I told you one time? When we were circling that black hole?”

He remembered perfectly. “You said ‘stuck with you, s’not so bad’.”

She stood on tiptoe and brought her lips to his, brushing them lightly before she settled back down beside him. “I’m confused, Doctor, as to why all this happened. We have a lot of talking to do. I know that you’re the Doctor, I do, but I think...I think I need to prove it to myself. So yes, I’d like to date you. We can be just like we were before I left.”

He beamed at her. “We’re going to need a hand to hold to get through this, you understand.”

“I do.”

“And I’m going to hold you to what you just said. I missed cuddling on the couch with you so much, just _so bloody much_ , Rose.”

She touched her tongue to her teeth. “I’ve a telly right over here, if you want to watch something.”

He nodded eagerly and she smiled, then stood on tiptoe again to kiss him, a little more sure this time.

“Just give me a little time, Doctor,” she whispered against his lips.

“You can have anything you want, love.”


End file.
